Has anybody ever been in a situation where they were happy to see fluorescent lighting? I'm talking about those long tube style ones with the opaque fly-filled screens over them, not the ones that light up sports stadiums. I know its more cost effective, and I'm all for saving the environment by lowering energy use, but can we please just switch back to all soft-white bulbs? I'll even take those new efficient LED bulbs that last for years.
Is there a single situation where one finds them self in a fluorescently lit room and feels relaxed and happy? Has anyone ever looked good in a picture taken under fluorescent lighting? My building ID picture makes me look like I just got picked up for soliciting prostitution from an undercover cop in the Florida panhandle. I've found that the only time that I'm being lit by these droning tubes are in shitty situations, often accompanied by grime and second hand smoke. To my knowledge, here are the spots that typically use fluorescent lighting from brightest to most dingy:
1.) Office buildings, dentist offices and hospitals
2.) Massive Wal-mart style stores and the DMV
3.) Bus stops and subway stations
4.) Toll booth plazas and guard booths
5.) Your friend's basement in high school where you went through your awkward stage in middle school
6.) Some crappy cabin you have to stay in on a high school "outdoorsy" team building trip
7.) Prison, the morgue or a police station
8.) Some shady gambling operation or OTB
9.) Solitary confinement in prison
10.) A room where Guantanamo detainees are tortured
11.) A room where US soldiers or CIA operatives are tortured in movies about the Middle East
12.) A room you wake up in when you're being held captive by a deranged serial killer and he plans on doing weird "medical experiments" or playing elaborate mind games
13.) A room you discover mutilated dead bodies in after some sort of ethnic cleansing
If I'm ever kidnapped and somehow I end up in a normal, well-lit room with some nice Ikea lamps and maybe even some high-hat recessed lighting I'm going to be completely thrown off. If you wake up in the damp dirty concrete room with the dripping water noise and the blinking fluorescent lighting, at least you have some idea of what to expect and can prepare yourself. But if you wake up on a plump mattress with some nice GE 100 watt soft white bulbs you could be dealing with a sick type of mind, and without question there's going to be some weird sexual aspect forthcoming. (side note: is it so much to ask these psychos to just grab a wrench and stop that leaking pipe? I mean just because they're deranged doesn't mean they wouldn't prefer increased water pressure and cheaper utilities right?)
Anyway, my point here is that fluorescent lights just bring about bad vibes and I think the we could improve the mood of billions by switching over to a bit softer lighting. Bring an Al-Qaeda member to the chandelier section of Home Depot and I can almost guarantee he'll perk up and consider abandoning the struggle. Otherwise we'll just remain slaves to the din of these neon assholes. God Damn it.
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